PARENT RESOURCE | Body Awareness & Autonomy

PARENT RESOURCE | Body Awareness & Autonomy

In mKids, we provide a safe and loving environment where we experience Jesus together, but we know that not all places and people are safe for our children all the time. With this resource, we hope to help you, as a parent or guardian, have courageous conversations with your children about body awareness & autonomy from as young as preschool-aged and up to young adulthood.

It’s important to have these conversations with your children because it’s about empowering them with the knowledge and confidence they need to navigate the world safely and with self-assurance. When we talk openly about their bodies and boundaries, we’re not just fostering trust between us, but also helping them develop a strong sense of self and respect for themselves and others. These conversations become opportunities to build strong bonds and let your children know that they can always come to you with any questions or concerns, no matter how big or small. It’s about giving them the tools they need to thrive, both physically and emotionally, as they grow and navigate life’s twists and turns.

We can make a difference today and for future generations by letting our children know that their voices matter and their bodies should be protected. It starts with courageous conversations. 


HOW TO HAVE COURAGEOUS CONVERSATIONS ABOUT BODY AWARENESS & AUTONOMY


  1. Choose the Right Time and Setting:
  •    Find a quiet and comfortable place where you can talk without distractions.
  •    Choose a time when your child is relaxed and open to conversation.
  1. Start with Basic Body Awareness:
  •    Use age-appropriate language to discuss body parts.
  •    Ask them if they have any questions about their bodies and answer them honestly.
  1. Teach Body Autonomy:
  •    Explain that their body belongs to them, and they have the right to decide who can touch them and how.
  •    Emphasize that it’s okay to say “no” to any touch that makes them uncomfortable, even if it’s from a trusted adult.
  1. Introduce the Concept of Privacy:
  •    Teach them about private body parts and explain that these parts are not for others to touch.
  •    Reinforce the idea that it’s normal to have personal space and boundaries.
  1. Use Everyday Scenarios:
  •    Incorporate everyday scenarios to discuss body autonomy, such as hugging relatives or holding hands with friends.
  •    Ask them how they feel about different types of touches and respect their preferences.
  1. Discuss Safe and Unsafe Touches:
  •    Teach them the difference between safe and unsafe touches.
  •    Use examples to help them understand what kind of touches are appropriate and inappropriate.
  1. Teach Assertiveness:
  •    Encourage them to speak up if they feel uncomfortable.
  •    Practice assertive phrases like “I don’t like that” or “Please stop” in a supportive and playful way.
  1. Address Secrets:
  •    Explain the difference between good secrets (like surprise parties) and bad secrets that make them uncomfortable.
  •    Let them know they can always share “secrets” with you, especially if it involves their safety.
  1. Be a Good Listener:
  •    Let them express their feelings and thoughts without interruption.
  •    Validate their emotions and let them know you are there to support them.
  1. Use Age-Appropriate Resources:
  •    Consider using books or videos designed for their age group to reinforce key concepts.
  1. Reinforce Trusted Adults:
  •    Remind them of trusted adults they can talk to if they ever feel uncomfortable or unsafe.
  •    Keep an open dialogue about who feels safe for your children between all family members.
  1. Encourage Questions:
  •    Let them know it’s okay to ask questions, and you’ll do your best to provide honest and age-appropriate answers.
  1. Revisit the Conversation:
  •    This is an ongoing dialogue. Revisit the topic periodically to ensure they understand and feel comfortable discussing it with you.
  1. Monitor Media Consumption:
  •    Be aware of the media they consume and discuss any inappropriate content they may encounter.
  1. Seek Professional Help if Needed:
  •    If your child discloses any uncomfortable experiences or if you notice signs of distress, seek professional help from a counselor or therapist.

 

Remember that fostering an open and trusting relationship is key. By maintaining open lines of communication, you create an environment where your child feels safe discussing their feelings and concerns with you.

 


WHEN TO HAVE COURAGEOUS CONVERSATIONS ABOUT BODY AWARENESS & AUTONOMY


AGE 3-5:

  1. Establish a Foundation of Trust:
  •    Create an open and trusting relationship with your child.
  •    Encourage questions and answer them in a straightforward manner.
  1. Teach Basic Anatomy:
  •    Use simple language to explain basic body parts.
  •    Reinforce that certain body parts are private.
  1. Discuss Safe and Unsafe Touches:
  •    Teach them the concept of safe and unsafe touches.
  •    Explain that certain areas are private, and no one should touch them inappropriately.

 

AGE 6-9:

  1. Build on Previous Conversations:
  •    Revisit the topics covered in earlier discussions to reinforce understanding.
  1. Explain Body Changes:
  •    Introduce the concept of puberty and the changes that come with it.
  •    Use age-appropriate books or resources to aid the discussion.
  1. Discuss Privacy and Boundaries:
  •    Emphasize the importance of privacy in changing areas.
  •    Teach them to set boundaries and say ‘no’ if they feel uncomfortable.
  1. Role-Playing Scenarios:
  •    Practice scenarios where they might feel uncomfortable and discuss appropriate responses.

 

AGE 10-12:

  1. Deepen Understanding of Puberty:
  •    Provide more detailed information about puberty, including emotional changes.
  •    Discuss menstruation and wet dreams based on the child’s gender.
  1. Explore Healthy Relationships:
  •    Discuss the qualities of healthy relationships.
  •    Emphasize the importance of communication and mutual respect.
  1. Online Safety:
  •    Discuss internet safety, including the importance of privacy online.
  •    Teach them to recognize inappropriate content and online behaviors.
  1. Reinforce Consent:
  •    Teach the concept of consent in different contexts, including physical contact and sharing personal information.

 

AGE 13-18:

  1. Open Dialogue:
  •    Encourage open conversations about their feelings, experiences, and concerns.
  •    Let them know you are there to support them without judgment.
  1. Discuss Sexual Health:
  •    Provide information on safe sex, contraception, and the importance of responsible behavior.
  1. Address Peer Pressure:
  •    Discuss peer pressure and ways to handle uncomfortable situations.
  •    Reinforce the importance of sticking to personal boundaries.
  1. Keep the Conversation Going:
  •    Continue discussing relationships, consent, and safety throughout their teenage years.
  •    Adapt the conversation based on their experiences and questions.

 


RESOURCES


DISCLAIMER: Please make sure to thoroughly read and research which books and resources work best for your unique family dynamics. There may be content you do not feel comfortable introducing to your child in their current developmental stages.

“Do You Have a Secret?” by Jennifer Moore-Mallinos

Through a relatable story, this book helps preschoolers and younger elementary-aged children understand the importance of sharing uncomfortable experiences and seeking help from trusted adults.

“C is for Consent” by Eleanor Morrison and Faye Orlove

This book introduces the concept of consent in simple terms, using everyday scenarios that preschoolers and younger elementary-aged children can relate to.

“Guy Stuff: The Body Book for Boys” by Cara Natterson

Geared toward older elementary and middle school boys, this book covers puberty, body changes, hygiene, and emotional well-being in a straightforward and relatable manner.

“Girl Stuff: The Body Book for Girls” by Cara Natterson

Similar to “Guy Stuff,” this book is tailored for older elementary and middle school girls and covers topics like puberty, menstruation, body image, and self-care.

“Consent (for Kids!): Boundaries, Respect, and Being in Charge of YOU” by Rachel Brian

This illustrated guidebook provides a clear and engaging explanation of consent, boundaries, and respect in relationships, empowering teenagers to navigate healthy and respectful interactions.

“God’s Design for Sex” Series by Stan and Brenna Jones

Book 1: The Story of Me for ages 3 to 5

Book 2: Before I was Born for ages 5 to 8

Book 3: What’s The Big Deal?: Why God Cares About Sex for ages 8 to 11

Book 4: Facing The Facts: The Truth About Sex and You for ages 11 to 14

“Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids” by Kristen A. Jenson, MA

For ages 8 and up, this book will help equip parents to begin the conversations, explain the science behind pornography’s effect on the brain, and empower kids to turn away from pornography. Good Pictures Bad Pictures Jr is available for children aged 3 to 7. 



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