11 Apr Discussion Guide: Where Can Wisdom Be Found? Week 11
Prayer
Take the first 10 minutes of your time together to listen to what God is doing in one another’s lives and pray for any specific needs people in your group may have.
Suffering…it’s a reality everyone goes through at some point in life. But what does suffering mean? Does it tell us something about ourselves? Does it tell us something about our world? Does it tell us something about God? The answer is a resounding YES. The real question is what does suffering tell us about those things, and perhaps even more importantly is the question of how can we navigate through our suffering in a way that makes us stronger in the end? That is what we will discuss during our time together.
Discussion Questions
Jen Hatmaker
”Suffering invites us to be radically human with one another, perhaps doing nothing more than reaching across the table, clasping hands, and weeping together. We are afforded the chance to create a safe place for someone else to mourn; nothing is needed but space, proximity, presence, empathy. Grief cannot be sidestepped; it must be endured, so may we be a people who endure with one another rather than constantly mitigating, explaining, propping up. Let’s just hold one another through the dark night and wait for the sun to rise.”
Can you name an instance where you have seen people in our world suffer? What do you think those people needed most in their suffering?
Has there ever been a time when you needed comfort in your own time of suffering? Was there someone to provide that comfort? If so, who?
What are some things that do not help provide comfort when we are going through a difficult time? Why do those things not help?
Psalm 13:1-2
How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?
When you suffer, what kind of thoughts towards God are you tempted to think?
How do those thoughts differ from what you usually tell people who ask how you’re doing?
Why do you suppose our internal thoughts differ so much from the answers we give others when they ask how we’re doing?
There seems to be this unspoken expectation in American Christianity that we have to always have it together and if we ever admit to struggling with our faith or through a particular area of trust in God then we’re not mature believers or somehow we’re not saved or don’t have enough faith. There’s an unspoken shame that comes upon us the moment we find ourselves questioning what God might be doing in a difficult situation. And so, when asked how we are doing we respond with words that do not match the thoughts we are wrestling with. We fear the judgement that awaits us in the minds of other Christians if we admit that life is not all blessed and peachy.
How might being honest with ourselves, others, and most of all God, regarding our frustrations, complaints, and questions, help us in the healing process?
God is not surprised by our questions or the anger and frustration we feel in times of suffering. He knows all of our thoughts from afar according to Psalm 139. And, God is also not intimidated by our questions and frustrations. See, when we suffer we don’t really need to know why as much as we need to know who is with is in the midst of our suffering. And, when we bring those questions to God He will answer them, not necessarily with the answers we want, but with answers that remind us that He is with us in it. Jesus is fully acquainted with our suffering because He willingly endured it in our place on our behalf. Being able vent our frustrations and know that God has heard us brings healing knowing that God has not only heard us but that He knows exactly what He’s doing brings healing. And, remembering God is good and just and loving in the midst of our suffering brings healing.
C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain
“The problem of reconciling human suffering with the existence of a God who loves, is only insoluble so long as we attach a trivial meaning to the word “love”, and look on things as if man were the centre of them. Man is not the centre. God does not exist for the sake of man. Man does not exist for his own sake. “Thou hast created all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created.” We were made not primarily that we may love God (though we were made for that too) but that God may love us, that we may become objects in which the divine love may rest “well pleased”.”
Why do you think people, including us, get so offended at God when suffering comes?
because we want God’s purpose to be about our own glory and comfort rather than His. This is the lie and belief that lead Adam to eat the fruit and it’s the lie that leads us to demand God gives us what we want. We think love means giving us our every desire, but what parent has ever loved his/her children like that? No, real love does what is needed not necessarily what is wanted. And what we most need is to see God more accurately and love Him more deeply and suffering is one tool that works that into our souls.
What does that mean about our view of God’s purpose in creation?
it means we think we are at the center of the Universe.
Why is it scary to admit that if God is God then He has the right to do whatever He wants in my life?
How might confessing that Truth and accepting that Truth actually set us free to be who God has created us to be?
Romans 5:1-8
Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die— but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
If we have been justified in Christ, and if God has proven His love for us beyond the shadow of a doubt in that while we were sinners Christ died for us, then what does that say about any possible reasons for our suffering?
How does the fact that the only truly innocent man to ever live, Jesus the Messiah, suffered the wrath of God on your behalf empower you to worship God and trust God even in the midst of your suffering?
Closing Thought
How can we encourage, support and walk with one another through suffering so that Jesus’ name is magnified even in the most difficult of circumstances?